Chapter 39

In the afternoon Jon really worried about Kim. Twice he’d knocked on her office door, but she told him to leave her alone. Unwilling he followed her plead, but barely couldn’t control himself when he heard her crying.

Finally he grabbed his phone and dialled Fran’s number. Maybe she could tell him how to deal with Kim. To his surprise Richie answered the phone.

“Rich? I thought you are in LA?”

“Hi brother. Well, I was, but my little princess was so curious about Fran and Jason that she begged me to fly back with her. We arrived Saturday morning.”

“How did the first meeting go?” Jon asked with a little smile on his face. Ava could be very demanding and most of the times Rich wasn’t able to deny her something.

“It went really well. She likes Fran…told me that she is happy I’m smiling and laughing again. I wasn’t that grumpy right?”

“Well, not exactly grumpy, but your eyes weren’t shining, buddy.” Jon told him. “What about Jason?”

“Oh, it seems they were separated by birth….unbelievable when you watch them. And Jason told me, he would look out for his hot new sister…I’m not sure whether I should be worried or happy about that comment.” Richie admitted.

Jon laughed. “You are screwed man, you are screwed.”

“Yeah, I know. So how is Kim doing?” Richie asked.

“She is crying in her office and don’t want me around.”

“Ahhh, shit…I’m sorry brother. Fran is sad too, but she is here with me….wait, she wants to talk to you.” Richie handed Fran the phone and gave her a soft kiss on her left cheek. Her eyes were all red from crying about Tyson. She would never get used to losing one of the kids and seeing the black despair of the parents. Never in a million years.

“I check on the kids.” He told her.

“Ok…” she said sniffing and turned her attention to the phone. “Jon?”

“Hi Fran.” Jon greeted her warmly.

“Don’t let her push you away, Jon.” Fran told him in a strict voice.

“She locked herself in her office, I can’t get close to her.” Jon said frustrated. “Is she always like that when she is losing a patient.

“Honestly, I don’t know.” Fran admitted.

“What do you mean you don’t know?”

“Well, it only happened twice so far and both times Kim didn’t show any emotion at the hospital. She thinks it is her duty to keep it together for the family. I tried to talk with her afterwards, but she simply took one day off and didn’t answer my calls. I’m only guessing here, but she probably cried her eyes out during these days.”

Jon couldn’t believe his ears. “She didn’t even show any emotions to you? I don’t understand it.”

“Maybe I do.” Fran said thoughtful.

“I remember one incident when we just met at school. She fell down some stairs and hit her knee, it was bleeding and looked rather nasty. They figured out later, she even had a torn ligament. So it hurt like hell. But she didn’t cry. She told me with clenched teeth ‘My dad said I should not cry. Tears won’t bring you anywhere.’”

Jon had no idea what to say. It was the first time that the picture of her father was getting some cracks. How could you tell your daughter something like this?

“Don’t get me wrong, Jon. She loved her father, she adored him. Everything she did in her life was to make him proud, to be like him. His work ethics had already influenced her when we met. I never met someone who was more disciplined and perfectionistic.” Fran paused shortly.

“Her mother was the counterpart, she did everything to make Kim see that there’s a little fun in everything. She showed her music and theatre. We went to the museum with her very often.” Fran remembered with a little smile on her face.

“I know that today Kim allows herself to cry when she is alone with you, that’s HUGE for her…” she stressed the word. “…but some tears is surely a difference to the outburst she’ll have today. Loosing someone simply hits her hard. If it’s anything close to it how it was three years ago. It will be very difficult for her…also physically.”

“And what should I do now?” Jon whispered with a lump in his throat.

“Are the dogs with her?” Fran asked. Jon looked around and realized he hadn’t seen them since Kim came home.

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Then the patio doors to her office are open. Go to her and don’t let her bully you away.” She told him softly.

“Ok, I’ll try it again. Thanks Fran.”

“You are welcome, Jon.”

Jon put his phone on the table and took a deep breath before going out on the patio. Fran was right the doors to her office were wide open.  Slowly he entered her office and stopped dead when he saw her curled up on that small couch, pressing a pillow to her chest and trembling from the sobs. It was heart-breaking.

He crossed the room and kneeled down in front of her. Sambo and Kidd raised their heads shortly and walked out of the way. It was as if they waited for him to come to her.

Gently he swept her hair out of her face and placed a small kiss on her cheek. She opened her eyes and stared at him.

“Go away.” She mumbled and hid her face in the pillow.

“No.” he answered.

“What?” she looked at him again.

“I said: No.” he repeated calmly.

“Jon, I really don’t wanna argue with you about this.” Kim said and sat up slowly.

“Good, I don’t wanna argue with you either.” He sat down next to her and continued. “We are together Kimi. I love you. You are suffering and I wanna comfort you. You would do the same for me.”

She stared at him unable to say a word. He ran his hand gently over her cheek.

“It’s no weakness to cry, to be sad. It’s human. I can understand that you don’t wanna show these emotions to strangers, but ….hey, it’s me.” He stopped shortly, but she was still staring at him, so he continued.

“There’s one place you can always show all of your emotions and that’s inside your family. And I think I’m the closest thing to family you have, besides Fran and Jason.” She nodded sniffing.

“You talked to Fran, right?”

“Yes.” He simply answered.

“She told you about Dad.” He nodded. “She never liked him.” Kim added a bit bitter.

“Kimi…I don’t think that’s true … and to a certain extent your dad was right: tears don’t bring you anywhere out there in the business world, but I’m not your business partner…I’m your friend, your partner, your lover.” He pointed out and took her hands in his. She nodded with tears in her eyes.

“It’s so unfair, Jon.” She sobbed and took refuge in his embrace. He kissed her temple and wrapped his arms tightly around her.

“I know, honey, I know.”