Chapter 59

 

She couldn’t move.

It was like she was paralysed.

She could feel the hard wooden floor underneath her.

And she could feel him.

He was lying on top of her.

Pinning her down with the full weight of his body.

Holding her down!

His icy blue eyes were staring at her hungrily.

His hot disgusting breath travelled over her body.

She tried to push him away, but he was stronger.

“I want you!”

“You are mine!“ he groaned into her right ear.

One of his hands travelled up her bare left leg and pushed up the skirt of her dress.

His fingers trailed along her panty before trying to pull it down.

She screamed!

“NO! NOOOOOO!”

“Kimi! Wake up!” somebody was shaking her.

“Kimi! Wake up! You got a bad dream!”

Her eyes flew open and she stared into blue eyes.

“NOOOO! Get away from me!” she tried to free herself from his grip, but wouldn’t let her go.

“Kimi, it’s me Jon! I won’t hurt you, honey.” The voice didn’t freak her out. It hadn’t this snobby arrogant tone, it was warm and protecting.

She stopped pulling away. Focusing on his face. Concerned blue eyes were looking at her. Prayed she would finally recognize him.

“Oh, Jon.” She sobbed and leaned closer to him. He sighed relieved. For minutes he’d tried to wake her up, but she wouldn’t come out of her nightmare.

“It’s ok, honey. I’m here. Nobody will hurt you. Nobody.” He rocked her softly while trying to calm down as well. It scared him that she wouldn’t wake up and was fighting him. He didn’t wanna hold her that strongly, but was afraid she would hurt herself if he would let her go in her daze condition.

Finally she calmed down enough to let him go and get her some water.

“I’m fine, Jon. Don’t worry.” She tried to assure him, when he watched every move she made concerned.

“No, honey. You are not.” He said softly and pushed a blond streak out of her face.

“Did you ever think about get some help? Maybe there are some tricks that can help you deal with those nightmares?” he was worried what would happen when she was alone while he was on Tour.

“I don’t need a therapy, Jon. It’ll go away. It already did once.” She got out of bed and reached for her overnight bag to pull another - not soaked - sleep shirt out of it.

Jon didn’t let her go home last night and she hated to admit it, but secretly she was very happy about it. She didn’t like to be alone after such a nightmare. She needed some human contact.

“Kimi, I was just…” he started again while watching her changing from the sweaty shirt into a clean one.

“No, Jon! It’s not a subject to discuss.” Her voice was hard. Jon sighed and kept his thought to himself. He knew if he’d push too much, she would never tell him about a nightmare again.

“Ok, ok…will you let me at least hold you tonight.” He asked and offered his hand to pull her back into bed. She watched him for a few seconds and could see that he wasn’t happy with her answer.

“Yeah.” She sighed and grabbed his hand. They really needed to get some sleep. Tomorrow or better tonight was the Band’s Premiere and they couldn’t fall asleep during it.

“I love you, Kimi.” He whispered, when he turned off the lights again and pulled her into his arms.

“I love you too, Jon.” She had to fight hard to keep her voice calm and even so he wouldn’t realize how choked up she still was.

Kim exhaled deeply and pretended to fall asleep. Soon she could feel Jon relaxing behind her. Smiling she caressed his left hand, which was holding her protectively against his warm body.

What if he was right? What if she really needed some help?

She tried to remember the nights ten years ago, but there was so much new stuff going on in her life that she had barely time to think about the events of this terrifying night. She sighed and turned lightly in Jon’s arms to look at him.

His features were relaxed again. He looked so cute and peaceful when he was sleeping. It must be a blessing to shut off your brain and relax.

She was so grateful that he was with her. It wasn’t easy for him to simply let everything go this way. He would have loved to find Nigel and kick his ass. It would have make him feel better, but not her.

Kim sighed again and started to think about all the things she needed to get done before tomorrow’s Premiere. She had to look outstanding. She wouldn’t give any magazine the opportunity to write something mean or bad about her or Jon.

Yawning she snuggled a little closer to him and finally fell asleep three hours before they had to get up.